How to Navigate the Top 10 Holiday Stressors
The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, celebration, and connection - I mean, just look at all the picture perfect posts on social media - as if she wasn’t just screaming at her family to put on their matching outfits and look happy. Ha!
But over here in real life, many moms feel a whirlwind of stress and pressure. Between juggling family responsibilities, shopping, cooking, and managing expectations, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.
I get it! Although I am a bazillion times better than I used to be, I still catch myself getting caught up in all the hype and comparison.
Let’s get real for a minute and call out the joy-suckers!
Here are the top 10 holiday stressors, and some practical tips for how to deal.
1. Financial Pressure
Stressor: The cost of gifts, decorations, and holiday meals quickly adds up!
What to Do: Start by creating a budget before the season begins and stick to it. Consider homemade gifts or experience-based presents like a fun class or a day trip instead of material items. Thoughtful gestures can mean just as much - if not more - than expensive gifts. Your love and presence are priceless.
2. Overcommitment
Stressor: The holiday season is full of invitations, events, and activities, but saying yes to everything can leave you feeling drained.
What to Do: It’s okay to say no! Prioritize the events and gatherings that truly matter to you so you can fully show up and enjoy it! It’s important to honor your energy and not overextend yourself.
3. Family Dynamics
Stressor: Family gatherings, while wonderful (…?), can sometimes bring up old tensions or uncomfortable situations.
What to Do: Prepare for potential stressors by setting clear boundaries with yourself before events. It can also help to have a few emergency distraction topics up your sleeve to pull out if needed. “So how about that election, huh?” KIDDING!!! No, absolutely do not use that one. Focus on the positive moments, and engage in activities that make you feel good. I can always find my husband playing outside with the kids when he’s had enough peopling ;)
4. Time Constraint
Stressor: The busy holiday schedule often leaves little time for downtime or self-care.
What to Do: Plan ahead! Set a schedule that includes time for relaxation, self-care, and hopefully, some fun. Delegate tasks where possible, accept help, and remember that you don’t have to do everything yourself. Even if it’s just 10 minutes of quiet time with a cup of tea, make sure you’re taking breaks to recharge… cuz, you’re gonna need it!
5. Unrealistic Expectations
Stressor: The pressure to create the “perfect” holiday experience can lead to stress and disappointment.
What to Do: Accept the fact that perfection is an idea created by people who want to sell you something. Instead, focus on the joy of the moment - even if you’re in a poop storm. Rather than striving for an idealized version of the holidays, make space for whatever feels right for you and your family. Sometimes, the most memorable - and funny - moments are when everything goes wrong.
6. Dietary Temptations
Stressor: The abundance of holiday treats can make it hard to stay on track with your health and wellness goals.
What to Do: Bring healthy dishes to gatherings so you have wholesome options available - this is what we do. Everyone knows I’ll be traveling with my crockpot in tow. If you feel awkward bringing your own food, you can try to focus on the whole food options - like protein, vegetables, and fruit. Another solution is to just allow yourself to indulge without the guilt. Either way, don’t be so hard on yourself and do whatever feels right for you!
7. Travel Stress
Stressor: Traveling during the holidays can be hectic and exhausting, especially with kids.
What to Do: Plan ahead and give yourself extra time for travel. If possible, consider traveling during off-peak times to avoid major crowds. Pack snacks, entertainment, and comfort items to make the journey more enjoyable. And remember, even if things don’t go as planned, you can still find joy in the adventure. You’re making memories! On our 12+ hour car rides back to WA we play games like, Fortunately/Unfortunately, word association, card games, tell stories from our childhood, and eat lots of snacks! Our last trip took us 17 hours to get home (5 more than it should have!) Although it wasn’t necessarily fun at the time, it has become a funny memory for our family.
8. Gift-Giving Pressure
Stressor: Finding the right gifts for everyone on your list can feel like a never-ending task.
What to Do: Start your holiday shopping early. I like to keep a list throughout the year of gift ideas that I pick up on so I’m not scrambling last minute. Thoughtful gifts, whether it be something physical or an experience, that show someone you’re really listening and paying attention to their needs and wants are the most appreciated.
9. Social Media Comparisons
Stressor: As I mentioned earlier, seeing others’ seemingly perfect holiday celebrations on social media can lead to feelings of inadequacy.
What to Do: Limit your social media time if it starts to overwhelm you. Focus on enjoying your own experiences, and remind yourself that every family’s holiday looks different. Social media typically shows the highlight reel, not the behind-the-scenes shit show that we all know is actually going on.
10. Lack of Self-Care
Stressor: With all of the busyness your own needs are probably going to be the last thing you think about (or not at all).
What to Do: Prioritize self-care - especially during the holidays. Allow time for activities that recharge you, whether it’s reading a book, taking a walk, meditating, or taking a salt bath. Taking care of yourself allows you to show up fully for your loved ones without burning out. Do you want your children to grow up hating the holidays because their mom always turned into a psycho? No, probably not.
Remember…
The holiday season doesn’t have to be a time of stress and overwhelm. By prioritizing self-care, setting realistic expectations, and focusing on the fun, you can create happy memories for yourself and your family. You deserve to enjoy the season just as much as anyone else. Be gentle with yourself, embrace the chaos, and make space for the moments that truly matter.